The end of the Blonde Blog

There's not much i can say. This blog doesnt really have my heart in it. I feel obligated to post to 5 readers who might not even be reading. The journey was crazy and u didnt get to see me thru it all.I hate giving up but im not giving up- im letting go

I am continueing to blog tho. If u like my writing u can follow me at http://offtheoldcerebello.blogspot.com/ http://parcels4god.blogspot.com/

Thanks for all the support

Finally,

Heather

8-31-2010

Uncertainty

Uncertainty

On sunday i went to muffy's baby shower and had a great time. Today is monday and im starting to wonder if i should stop the blogging.... Its hard to find time with my napping schedule and nobody is reading. I'd hate to quit tho, it'd just prove that blogger really is dead. we'll see how i feel in a couple days.

School was great, men are pissing me off. but its w.e

Ughhhhhh

2' adays

2' adays
In the last days this is whats happened:

• • • Found out I'm only short half a credit to be a senior, so next semester i
      will be a junior
      

    Florida state apps are due in October-EEK!!
    I love fire drills, i run
    into everyone

    
    My applied nutrition2 class seems bearable

    
    I love wedges

    
    If you're not comfortable with a photographer, u take icky pictures

    Senior pictures are about as nerve
    wrecking as the first day
    of senior year

  Trying to blog is hard when I'm always crashing after school and
  homework. doing
  my best.

Threes A crowd

Threes A crowd
Well i seem to be sending out post into an empty abyss, i have 0 new followers; which makes me frown :(

Today was really great, still having problems with my credits. It worries me because its not fair. And I'm really upset and i should be allowed to be upset. Its MY FUTURE

Idk what I'd do with out *hank. Even if he isn't here...

Today's outfit: Strapless belted lace dress, cowboy boots.

Today's Grievance's: Fear.

Hoping for the best....

My First 2 days of Senior year

My First 2 days of Senior year
Hey there bloggers, sorry i havent posted- i have been SWAMPED from escuela (School) :)

My Classes are:
English 12 honors
Algebra 2
Chemistry Honors
Latin 1
--
Applied Nutrition 2
Power Energy Transport
Spanish 3 Honors
Us History
--------------
I'm pretty sure i'm dropping an elective because A future Paleontologist should take Zoology (Honors course) I am definitly dropping Us history despite my best friend being in that class. I need as many Honor courses as i can get. Bring it baby :D


First day was amazing but today, my second day was ehhhhh. I'm supposed to be up by 5:00, i didnt get up till 5:50!!! I have to be outside my house by 6:15!!! So i didnt get to hairspray my hair, and it fall flat; i felt SOOOOOO ugly.

Looking forward to tomorrow; Strapless lace dress with ruffle front, belted and cowboy boots to match. Going for a sultry western look.

Today's griveances: Classes with some one u want to punch in the adams apple.GRRR

Today's outfit: Green halter sundress, silver accents

Ready for bed..I'll try to stay current :)

My last Day of Summer

My last Day of Summer
I cant believe this is my last day of summer. Tomorrow will be my last first day of school ever.Its so crazy, looking back at the last 3 yrs of my life. I will never forget my first day of high school, or kindergarten or middle school. Its crazy to see how far I've came along. It kills me that I'm not ending things in Florida but I've grown up here. It's so scary, next year this time i will be starting college. I don't know how things are going to be when I'm a mom because i cant Handel my own departure. Makes me think how short life truly is, and that's why i always stop to smell the roses.

Today's Grievances: Guess who didn't get the job at Lowe's because she's underage? Hmmm no guesses? Hint: You're reading her blog. Maybe you're not, nobody reads this thing.

Today's outfits: Pencil skirt with ruffle top, black heels.Then blue ruffle one shoulder top with shorts

Amazement baby,Amazement

Amazement baby,Amazement
Ok so let me tell u, let me tell u!!!
Today, august 21st 2010 has been amazing! i went shopping,almost done!Then i get home and i have a job interview!

So yea I'm happy :)

Today's Grievances: Target brand Honey barbecue chips. Too honey, not enough barbecue.

Today's outfit: Blue butterfly sleeve knit tank, shorts, crocodile wedges.

I hope this is a sign of how this year's going to go. If so then I'm stoked!

With heart..

With heart..
So let me tell u about yesterday!!!! I went to the mall with Donnie, chuckie and this boy Kevin i just met for the first time [remember that, its very important!!] I waited AN HOUR!! because they couldn't find me IN FRONT of best buy!!! Oh and it gets better!! One of the first things Kevin said to me "How are you not pregnant?!" SO ignorant. The whole time he was a flat out a$$!But Donnie assured me that it was because it was he wasn't used to be around girls, I don't care- don't treat me like that. I was legit about to beat his a$$

Anyway today i got my ear repericed due to my right one ripping. I got some more school clothes. Tweed shorts, black tank and white skirt. 4 more days!!!!!!

Today's grievance's: Everything...again.

Today's outfit: Floral tank layered with gray tank, Bermuda's.

I'm over this summer k?Put me out on that bus stop, hand me those text books.

Pouring

Pouring

Have u ever woke up in the middle of the night and just shook your head over your life?
-I have
Have you ever wondered where your life was going while you were head some where else?
-I have

And i bet you've walked over the journey many times, just to get a feel for it again; because i have

Today's Grievances: Decisions.

Today's outfit: Skinny jeans, black heels, tank.

Can you make a mess out of something that was jumbled in the first place?

I know a place where the grass is really greener

I know a place where the grass is really greener
If you're reading my blog for the first time, yes my post do really contradict them self lol

I am kinda excited for next week, yes next week i will be a senior!!! I am however still trying to make sure i look smoking hot. Lots of yoga, and running. Not quite done shopping, i need shoes, bags,jewelery and skirts. Plus I'm in dire need of metallic nail polish and my bangs cut! But yea i'm excited :)

Today's Grievances: Slow computers

Today's outfit: undecided, as of this moment sports bra and shorts.

I am camera less for a bit, so I'm posting what i can; it might be old. But hey a model is a model. But that i am not :'( jk I'm getting there

Stress is a 6 letter word

Stress is a 6 letter word
Stress is a 6 letter word, that feels like a ton of bricks. As if i didnt have alot on my plate as it is. Yesterday it all came crashing down on me. Before the only thing i worried about was having decent grades and not getting in trouble. Now its Get a job, save enough money to leave,Get into college, Do great on the SAT's, Get straight A's.... It's all too much for me.

Today's Grievances: Everything

Today's outfit: Shorts, plaid button down, tank and pigtails :)


Today sucks. Life sucks. I'm over it all.

Rainy days

Rainy Days
I dont know about u but it was raining in my kneck of the woods.Cool enough to wear pants :)

Drove around bowie to find where my mother is doing her externship [she's a medical assistant]. Fun but i'm tired, had Honey Chipotle wings-SOOOO GOOD!!!!

Today's Grievance's: Leaving florida and the what could've beens.

Today's Outfit: Skinny jeans&sheer beige ruffle polka dot top [Both charlotte russe]Black under shirt [kohls]

I always second guess myself, and i hate it. Tomarrow is the Last first day of school for my lovelys in Florida.That is why my picture for today is of my last day in Florida.This post is dedicated to them. I love and miss every last inch and being of that pennisula. Keep me in your thoughts,remeber there's only one first day of highschool freshman year, think of when u met me.Cause i'll never forget when i met u..

Settle.

Settle.
I'm growing up, and I've been thinking alot lately. Like who i want in my life, and relationships. I've decided its best i think with my head rather than my heart because my heart likes douche bags; and they don't seem to treat me right [hence douche bag]. Sometimes its better to settle.

I texted *Rob last night. I mentioned him in What i don't get and the V-card.I do love him, and i know he's a player but he's there for me.I don't see anyone else stepping up; that i like back.He's him, and whether were together or not, i'm always going to think of him.I rather we be together.

Today's Grievances: Settling.

Today's outfit: Gray tank and tutu like skirt

So call me blonde on this one but Did u know Junk yards actually exsist outside movies?!? I was blown away. My mom needed some parts so we went to junk yard. I was not dressed for it. There was broken glass everywhere and i was wearing flip flops. Here are some pictures i took:




Overall a fun day. Had tomato basil bisque
_________
Love isnt fun anymore..........&Boys are stupid

Blonde Broading

Blonde Broading
I didnt get to post yesterday, i was busy back to school shopping and took a benedrly which knocked me out. I got A white embroiderd dress and Navy baby doll tank from Charlotte Russe.Freshman year my closet was ALL Charlotte Russe, that seems like ages ago.

Today went to walmart [i hate walmart] and got some snacks.I still do not feel well, i have a horrible headace. That usally means Mother Nature is paying me a visit soon, which i hope because i dont want her to visit the first week of school.

My canker sore is gone!!!

Today's Grievances: The same old things. Need some excitment in my life. I wanna meet some one new.

Today's outfit: Blue demin shorts (kohls), Blue paisley lace top (Kohls) and a fabulous teal scarf that my dad bought me from burlington coat factory. They have the best scarves.

I've been thinking alot. I'm growing up, trying to figure out who i want in my life.Just hope he wants to be in mine too.

You're biggest regret

You're biggest regret
Today i had lunch with my mother and her friends. Then went shopping for back to school clothes. Chambray prairie dress and a plaid shirt dress; gorgeous. They seem to minimize my chest, which i love.

Today's grievance's: Saying you live with no regrets and actually living with no regrets are to very different things.

Today's outfit: Lil' black dress, heart pendant necklace [given by my bestie], Dora Explorer ring and nude wedges. I know what you're thinking-Dora, really? Some kitsch is good. People wear lip rings[right?] and i love Dora :P

I love how a guy can be trying to get with u [not that i care] and then the second some one else comes along, the texts are one worded and eventually dissipate. Shaking my head [as we youngings say]. Its crazy how you can be that fake. I say " look I've met someone, i don't think its best we talk, you're great but i need to do whats best for me.". Maybe its cause that Lil' beating thing, you know gives u a pulse- whats that called? OH YEA A HEART

But don't worry baby, I'll be you're biggest regret

Homemaker or hooker?

Homemaker or hooker?
How is it that i can walk 2 miles in 6in heels but not 2 feet in 2in heels? Am i destined to be a hooker, not a homemaker? I hope not...

I feel sick today and of course after I've tooken a benedrly i put together a great outfit.Like literally 5 minutes after. Drat.

Today's Outfit: Blue ruffle sweetheart dress with an Over sized Knit sleeveless cardigan and silver peep toe pumps. The dress i got at Beals in Florida, for i think around 10 bucks-TOTAL STEAL!!! The pumps, i die for. I purchased them at rugged wear house for 9 dollars. I wore them to home coming, and got tons of compliments on them.I think i want to be buried in these shoes.

Today's Grievances: Saying you don't sext/sex email and people still ask u to do it then blow u off when u say no. No particular person, i get this a lot. I even had to add a BTW to my facebook about me. No means no Hun.

I need to stop texting **Miguel. How can i move on, when I'm drawing him in?

15 more days. I need fashion, but first i need a J-O-B.

"i think you may be on my list of regrets, but i'm not sure yet so lets play this out like a hollywood movies"-Me

"i think you may be on my list of regrets, but I'm not sure yet so lets play this out like a Hollywood movies"-Me

Today i woke feeling like complete and utter crap. My sinuses are acting up and I'm not sure why but I'm guessing my fear of senior year is suspect.

Yesterday i wrote about how i got canker sore medication, and if i didn't then you know now :)
The package says to call poison control if a lot is swallowed. I'm assuming that it means swallow a lot because how can you not swallow oral medication? Anyway I'm pretty sure i swallowed a lot [lol]. It says not to apply for more then seven days unless directed by a doctor so I'm putting it on twice a day for seven days.My canker sore is fairly large [on my standards] so i am swallowing alot. If i die then have the company and my parents read this, maybe they can clear up there warning labels.

Made chicken tortilla soup from scratch, I'd give u the recipe but i think I'd like to pass this down to my future children :)

Today's grievance's: Feeling yucky.

Today's outfit: Mostly PJ's, but eventually resided to booty shorts, knit tank, and plaid mini vest. But I'm probably going change tops and add cowboy boots.

Were you ever upset and just rolled with the moment? Maybe I'm just scared. I don't like not knowing where my life is headed.

"I hope the exit is joyful and i hope never to return"-Freida Kohl

"I hope the exit is joyful and i hope never to return"-Freida Kohl
Last night was Crazy fun. It was just Erin, no fish tacos and no movie. I did get a fudge waffle bowl from DQ. But i wish i wouldn't gotten fish taco, cause I'm dieing for one now.

Today's Grievance's: If there's anything i hate most in this world its being played. I may a b!(h but I'll be dam if a boy makes me out to be one.

Got medicines for canker sore, so nasty! And ma says i don't have a cavity but i know shes wrong. Just wait till my canker sore is gone, then we'll see. DONE WITH TRIAL MEDICINE!! Mom said that since i haven't taken it for a week that its not going to work and she's going to call the doctor [SO HAPPY!]

My quest for being "discovered" as a model has slowly dissipated to a hopeless absis. But i am happy that i have 5 followers! I started with 0, and my first one was my friend, so thank u all for following. But seriously, i want to model.

Today's outfit: Color block dress.

[**Miguel sucks]

17 more days, it finally hit me. Not ready. I need to go back to the beginning of summer and do it all over again.

Pre [its a Prefix]

Pre [its a Prefix]
Mall today with my little rice krispy treat Erin, which when i say I'm hanging with Erin, its never just Erin. It's her, her twin sister, our friend Ashley and sometimes Dani & Stephanie; which i love. I don't think I'll Have time to blog later, so here whats now.

Today's Grievances: Canker sores AND cavities. There needs to be a free dentist, cause I'm about to rip out my 2 back teeth.

So if you're wondering if somethings wrong with your cell, no. He's just ignoring u:
I hate when people ignore u, there needs to be a book on texting etiquette. If you text me and i don't wanna talk; I TELL U!!! Or i make up some excuse, but at least i don't leave u hanging.

Today's outfit: Not sure yet but most likely my sequin skirt look, or maybe something floral, or my Tu-Tu skirt lol. I just wanna look fly :)

Fish tacos today and maybe inception.I always have fun with these girls, and I'm ready to go man hunting. Any Good pick up lines?

Somethings fall apart, i guess we never all together in the first place, huh?

Somethings fall apart, i guess we never all together in the first place, huh?
Today i start with something that hurt. I blogged about *him in some earlier posts [there's just something about summer], *him isn't a good name changed, for now on *him will be known as **Miguel. **Miguel, i hate saying that I've fallen for people but i really did with him. Even though our last "talk" was about figuring it out when he got back and we haven't really talked talked but it never feels that way. Turns out he isn't coming back. He is going away, and i don't know when i will see him again. The last chance that "we" had gone. I always held out hope for this one, even though he played me. "You're the one i want"... And like 5 others too. Right, babe?
I even cried a tad, but I'm over it.I'm hear when you're ready to be a man,but don't be surprised if I'm already gone.

Had lunch with my sister, got some sun. Good day. Didn't go to bed last night. Ready to crash

You cant cry and fall apart over what happened, or what you lost; if it was never really all together in the first place.

The Doctors, Bentobloggy & the excitement

The Doctors, Bentobloggy & the excitement
Today i feel sick, really sick. Vomited. So like any normal teenager i emailed The Doctors [TV show]. Told them about my problems. Hopefully i get some help. They are the experts anyway, and why go to a whole bunch of doctors when there are 4 (5) great ones there?!?!

Somedays a girl just needs her best friend. The fact that shes a thousand miles away and most of what i want to tell her cannot be told in 150 words or less, sucks. I love her tho :)

Bentobloggy- An amazing blog i stumbled upon. Having a giveaway and i'm not even gonna lie; i want to win. I've never won anything. Well once i entered my mom for this contest to win a cruise, she won. But that doesnt count. It's a really great blog, so you should check it out!!

Todays Griveance's: Being sick. We should all be healthy all the time.

Todays outfit (if i get the strength to get out my PJS): Floral romper with heels, flower ring and key necklace :)

If my post today seems empty, i'm sorry.I'm just ready to go to bed.

Even the best fall down sometimes....

Even the best fall down sometimes....
Another day of nothing. Rob* still manage to piss me off even though i hadn't talk to him since yesterday

Today's grievance's: Canker sores...EW

Nobody remembers when they were a baby, from out the womb [or test tube] to crying and having random stranger and hold us; its all a blur. I have a feeling that this is when i realized i was meant to be Unforgettable. My whole life, I'm supposed to be Marylin Monroe [minus the dieing young]. For me "sexting" is a no-no. I'm trying to be a paleontologist/ fashion designer. Cant be having stuff like that out there. My moment of bliss is when I'm getting dressed. That's when i feel like Jesus: I have the whole world at my finger tips, the ability to look like a rock star.

Today's Outfit: Navy sundress, black studded flip flops and my key necklace. Very Bohemian today :)

Only 21 more days, then its the year that counts.. Nervous much???

What i dont get...& the V-card

What i don't get...& the V-card
Today was a boring day but luckily i have lots of stuff to rant about.

What i don't get: Bored, thought I'd text Rob*. What turned from reminiscing to a mess: Should've been expected on my part. I love you; Three words that of all people i cant have heard by this one semi-significant boy. How can you love a girl that you haven't texted or called for months, or that you haven't realized shes deleted you off her facebook.Again. When SHE texts you, you don't seem invested in the conversation. I don't get it. So i had to tell him. Truth is that i really care about him, but i don't love him. We've never been in a relationship. And even as a friend things always drifted to talks about "Us". I used to say i loved Rob* as a friend but i can't even say that now. He Loves me but he doesn't care about me. A big fight then i have to sit and here his sexual conquest in class. I don't forget that kinda stuff.Flipping out because i don't wanna hug u, All the drama. I can get past. The one thing holding me back from him. It doesn't matter, hes gonna keep player playing.. I don't get it one bit.

V-card: Whether religious or not, an act of abstinence or celibacy is there. Mine happens to be religious; in 5th grade "i found Jesus". Religious for a while but not so much any more. Back then i used god as my crutch for survival.Now he's there for support, not as means to live. I made my Purity pledge and I've stuck with it. It's not something I'm willing to give up. Even if i didn't believe in god i don't think I'd want to have pre-martial sex. Its hard, it always hurt me.Guys, they don't get it. Most say they do but down the line, i get cut again. A lot say if it was just sex, not oral they could do that. But apparently no intimacy means no go. I'm still waiting for the guy that doesn't assume a big breasted women means easy. I'm still waiting for the day that my abstinence doesn't shame me....

(Sorry for the long post, i just gotta vent)

Today's Outfit: Pajamas

Today's grievance's: Men.

Too much shaking my head today.Maybe its all the disgrace

*Name has been changed :)

Butterfly kisses

Butterfly kisses
It takes something like getting you're eye brows done to really set things straight.
I've had so much on my mind. Men on my mind. The other night i was looking back at old myspace messages [from when i lived in Florida]. Just going over it made me see how much I've grown up. I always said back then how i wasn't scared of being some one and i really believed that. But looking back, i was. And i let alot of great guys that i really cared about go. Especially Paul*. The most perfect guy for me,even wanted to go out with me but no because he was "too nice". WTF??? i was an idiot. I think i realize that when i started to fall for him, the same time i found out i was moving. That last day, came him just to say goodbye to me and yes i know it sounds cliche and mushy and i hate it but kinda fit perfectly into each others arms. There i said it. Point is, i don't wanna mess things up like i usually do.

Today's grievance's: Mosquito's.

Today's outfit: In the picture, paired with those cowboy boots.Never wore boots with a dress [minus leggings] before, and i liked it :]

God if you're reading, just let me know if I'm doing alright.

Cause When a Heart break no it dont break even....

Cause When a Heart break no it don't break even.....
I just don't get why after knowing some one for so long, u act like this. It really irritates me. Cause you think someones grown up and you think they've change but no; they're still the same. You still have the same issues you did back then. I don't think this is something i can get past. Maybe its time to finally let this go.....

Today's Grievance's: Knowing the smart thing to do. Why cant we live in oblivious bliss? Right? Ignorance is bliss, that crap. Yea why can't i have that. Why do i always have to make the responsible decision?

Today's Outfit: As you can see in my picture; Badgely Mischa blazer, basic white ribbed tank, 579 mini skirt with Pink necklace :)
I am addicted to this blazer, got it for 48 bucks at off neimens. This is def. one of my favorite go to looks

I just wish i had it all figured it out. I'm not counting on my happily ever after, I'm counting on stability. Whatever that means, but i need some of it. So if you're reading- could u pass some along???